Greetings, dear Inquisitors & other curious readers!
As you have my beloved Apocalyptic Almanac in your hands, I can only assume I’d begun to feel the flames lick at my feet & saw no other option but to flee. But I’ve committed no real crime here, and shall not allow you to cast your judgement without first casting mine.....
Extracts from the Apocalyptic Almanac of the infamous Heretic, Witch, Alchemist, Foul mouthed Rabble Rouser & herbalist extraordinaire Agatha Peasu..obtained during her Inquisitorial Trial in 1533.
🌀Upon the day of Jupiter, on the 4th of the 1st 2024, I share with you the first chapter of my beloved magnum opus 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔸𝕡𝕠𝕔𝕒𝕝𝕪𝕡𝕥𝕚𝕔 𝔸𝕝𝕞𝕒𝕟𝕒𝕔 𝕠𝕗 𝔸𝕘𝕒𝕥𝕙𝕒 ℙ𝕖𝕒𝕤𝕦: Renaissance Witch, Herbalist & Dancer Extraordinaire for you all to read for free!
🌿This magickal tale is the product of many, many years of research, both in the dusty bowels of the library as well as while wandering upon the wild heath. Agatha is my witchy alter ego, a spirit of my past life who is always whispering to me her wisdom. And She wants her story to be told!
🔥The Preface: 𝔸𝕘𝕒𝕥𝕙𝕒 ℙ𝕖𝕒𝕤𝕦 𝔾𝕠𝕖𝕤 𝕥𝕠 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝔹𝕣𝕠𝕔𝕜𝕖𝕟, is what you can feast your eyes upon today. It tells the tale of our red hatted protagonist, who climbs the misty mount famed as a meeting place of Witches, after having an unsavoury encounter with a balding theologian, who’s head resembled a moulding potato (her words not mine..)
🌹So what are you waiting for? Go join our wretched witch upon the mountaintop, trip balls and ride backwards upon a pig, witness smoking pyres and empty hearth stones and regain your magickal sense of purpose!